Julie and Julia, and damn spoilers ... :D

And just finished with Julie and Julia.. Wait. Something working in my head. Connecting the dots. Alright.
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 I guess I have figured it out. 

So I was in middle of the book, and I was having this itching itching question that is this all a true story. I wanted to know who Julie and Julia are. How do they look. So on evening of yesterday I was trying to look it up on my cell. My god damn network was working perfectly alright till the moment I would open the god damn UC browser and then it would go null. As in entirely no internet sort of thing.I am not having my network pack active on the regular card but I am using one on my spare card, but it was working fine for all other things as what's app and instagram n Pinterest for gods sake. But it would go off like some kind of force trying to stop me from getting the information I wanted. 
And so that evening I could not look up anything,(because my fairy angel was preventing me from ruining my book reading experience before even finishing it up, but alas! :() Then next day I searched it on my laptop and there they were. Real people. Julia in her red hairs like that prison cook from orange is the new black and Julie like a happy looking a little fat lady in her sparkling smile and beautiful red carpet black dress. And they are real. And then... BAM!
I read a sentence that Julia didn't really liked Julie's project and she thought Julie was doing it for the sake for stunt. God... It was a huge spoiler. Why would on the freaking earth I read that. I wished later that my mind will bend with a thought that probably Julia was wrong about Julie. Probably this wasn't at all a stunt after all. But.... Noooo. Spoiler are worse kind of torture you know. You can't just get rid of them even if you want to. And then the rest of the book I read in a quest to find whether julie was actually doing it all for the sake of show off. And at some points I even felt it as... I could see how pissed she would get for something which isn't going fine.. I really kind of set aback with her snappiness  with Eric. He seems like a nice guy. Well I guess he is really in love with her to listen to all the things she says or the way she behaves with him. But apart from all this. I loved the way she kept going on. Against all odds. And I think after the end of book, Julia's comment was not true after all. I didn't felt this was any kind of stunt. Probably julia did achieved her cullanary skills after a lot of practice and failed experiments but her struggle isn't visual to me, (I am yet to read her memoir of course) but still...after a while, and churning my head with possible outcomes of what I thought of the book, I think the julie Julia project wasn't just a sort of stunt pulled off to gain popularity. After a while it has gone so much serious for Julie to make it come true or finish it up. And against all odds she fights back, let it be by pushing, cursing, throwing utensils, killing alive lobsters and maggots, getting marrow out of bones of a happy cow and snapping at the person who loved the most for the sake of this project through the way. As if she did had something to gain in the end. And even though I don't know Julia yet. I do like the Julia in Julie's head. Since she seems to be with Julie all that difficult and dangerous path, she wasn't someone who would call Julie a stunt maker or not serious. I think the only thing julie ever was through out the all things was that she was 'serious'. But it wasn't just about cooking,. It was something beyond cooking. It was about risking and yet expecting that this had a better end. And you have got it Julie. :) 
Loved your book, and your amazing humor of course. And as well. Use of word f*** often :D and your friends and your dedication... 
To  "julie and Julia "

Sairat... A half realistic tale

Well the first time I read about the new upcoming movie "Sairat" was when I read a joke about it on whats app.
After it I read an entirely contradictory opinion about someone who was giving critic opinion against such movies of teen age love, and had mentioned many such movies which had came with the similar plot. It even included a sarcastic remark as students are getting bold and getting an unusual side of teen adult love and these movies are definitely putting a contrasting effect on their minds.
So personally when I had seen "Fandry" for the first time, I thought it was an epic movie, not just because it won national award and because it showed a tale happening in a absolute realistic environment of India which divided our society in many layers for the sake of cast and creeds as well a social  status. Those whoever said to me that they were really bored while watching people running behind pigs I was smiling to myself feeling as when people are going to get out of these stereotypes of movies and start appreciating what is actually amazing and yet so difficult to explain in words, and the director is delivering in a single expression on actors face. It was fabulous beyond praise.
And then when I read the sarcastic review of the unknown person who had gave his opinion in such hurried manner and trying to put an effect on others opinion.
But when I watched movie finally and I felt how instant the reaction that was. Rather movie wasn't even about teen adult love only. It had a  lot to understand and feel beyond whatever had been written in that opinion.
I do agree that I was quote shocked with the end, but it left me for thinking that is it the end of all the hustle they went through?
but even then they did went through it all and sustained against all the odds, and still the society was not giving a chance to take freedom and survive by going against it.

And I think that is the purpose of movies, rather it should be... That they agitates the way you think, they give you a new view towards you have been keeping your eyes closed. This is of course true that not everyones love story will not be successful as it was of the movie, nor will it have a gore end like it was in movie.
So ultimately movie was one of the memorable ones that I will always remember.

To Sairat.
and to making genuine effort of making realistic movies.

Edit: While searching frantically that whether film is based on true story, I found this link

http://www.forbes.com/sites/dongroves/2016/05/11/teenage-romance-sairat-breaks-box-office-records-in-india/#5ca1044462ed

an article in forbes eh :D thats awesome....

Me before you

So a book whose movie is upcoming. which stars one of my favorite series heroin(Emilia Clarke- Daenerys Targaryen) and opposite actor whom I thought was only awesome looking pirate after johnny depp (and will turner of course) in pirates of Caribbean.  so I dug a little deeper and found out the book on which the movie is based on and My goodness. Well I am sort of mushy romantic type of books reader and this was ultimately the one, So on my way home for my holidays I finished almost half of the novel while I was traveling with extreme heat and strawberries to company me while I fought an urge to be nauseous again, and it was worth it....

but then the remaining novel I read later and

Worse worse worse...
This time was the worse period where I cried.
God... I was literally shaking with fear when I finally got at some of the last moments. As if I was the one who was having a closure. Perhaps it has something to do with me being extra emotionally attached to books or the author did fantastic job in creating a world so real through her writing.  And then it all came over me like sudden terror. A fear of death and the definite wish of will. God. Why world has to be so cruel. And do we really get to choose the death? Isnt it's kind of a thing that we should wait upon.
I was lying on my bed in my home of my parents and there was a blank space where my grandma would sleep and for all at once it was about everything.
About life
about death
about letting your most favourite person in the world go.
I am so damn sure if my parents found me sobbing and crying like that over a book they will look at me absolutely with disbelief.
But that's me... I get these sudden urges to read that makes me feel vulnerable and emotional.
I kind of felt that author was being little like new at writing. Absolutely in the start it didn't had any emotional part into it. But as I read and things started go build inside my head like the kind of home Will had and the kind of home Louisa had. And then I was literally just wishing that ... This one had a happy end. But it would have been such a cliche. Seriously.
But then it didn't feel cliche after all. Even when it ended. It seemed perfect. And I was agreed with Will. Right from the moment he said that he can't be the way he is for rest of the life, and not being able to reach out for her by himself.
And then it came to me that not all the stories are supposed to end with a happy ending and even if they do have kind of a sad end, it doesn't have to be a bad story.
I really appreciated her efforts to keep him, make him understand that she loved him. But I was absolutely agreed with the fact that  it was him who was right all the way.

I have seen people making this television thing on the death wish. Well.in a way I did remembered paralytic  story of aruna shanbag which I read. And felt would it be better if we did approved this kind of thing and gave relief to these trapped souls. But... How can someone has a right over something which has no control of humans.
But then who am I to give any opinion about how they should look at life and then it's not just because they are paralytic means life has ended.

God ... I shuddered at the thought of not being able to move my finger and relying on some one else for all things. And it's such a study of deep human emotions, a study of people around the person suffering, people loving them despite of the disability they have, and people wanting just an escape from this all agony. I wish I could write more about this, this death subject kind of gets my nerves. I wish there could be an easy answer to everything, so far for this thing.

I can only pray for all those who are out there fighting against these emotions or those who are having terrible moment of time will find a way out of it. Either by their own choice or destiny may bring something good to look forward to. I wish all such distressed soul will be at rest, dead or alive. ..

I guess if you took a little time reading my blog, you might as well read its synopsis. :)

so here it is, its from wikipedia of course, because baby once I start writing short description it goes on for more pages than I could count. 

Will Traynor was a high achieving and wealthy man who enjoyed life to its fullest, whether this was his successful and demanding job, the many adventures he had experienced, or his equally successful girlfriend. However, he becomes permanently disabled due to an unfortunate road accident.

Two years later, Louisa Clark loses her job at the local café "The Buttered Bun". She is a 26-year-old, unambitious woman with very few qualifications. Louisa lives with her working-class family and is constantly outshone by her younger, more intelligent sister, Treena, who is a single mother. Her parents become disappointed because the entire family depends on her wage. Louisa goes to the Job Centre where Syed, the Job Centre assistant, finds a unique position: look after a disabled man. Despite no prior experience, Louisa is hired by Camilla Traynor, the mother of Will, because she thinks her son needs someone able to brighten his spirits. Louisa notices how falsely everyone is acting in Granta House, Will's family mansion. She later finds out that Mr. Traynor, Will's father, has an extra-marital relationship. Will becomes more communicative and open-minded during his time with Louisa acting as his caregiver.

Louisa notices that Will's wrists are covered with scars. One day, she overhears Will's mother and sister talking privately and learns that he tried to commit suicide shortly after his mother refused to grant his wish to end his life through Dignitas, an assisted suicide organization. Horrified at his attempt to commit suicide, his mother agrees to honor his wish, but only on the condition that he agrees to live six more months. In that time, she secretly plans to change his mind and show him life is still worth living.

Louisa decides to keep the fact that she overheard hidden from Will and his mother. However, she does end up telling Treena and together they come up with ideas to convince Will to abandon his wish. Over the next few weeks, Will loosens up and agrees on Louisa shaving his beard and cutting his shaggy hair, which he himself had not done in ages. Louisa executes her plans and takes Will to outings, and although Will is significantly happier, she senses that it isn't enough to convince him. Finally, she's overwhelmed and decides she can no longer be a part of Will's assisted death. Mrs. Traynor recognizes the positive effect Louisa has had on Will and persuades her until she comes back to work with Will. In a last and desperate try, Louisa tells Will’s parents and sister that she wants to organize for Will a foreign visit to the island of Mauritius. Meanwhile, the financial situation in Louisa’s family gets worse as her father loses his job, but fortunately, Mr. Traynor offers Louisa’s father a position at the castle.

Will and Louisa end up spending their days talking frequently to each other, her being his caregiver. He notices that she has a very limited life and that her ambitions are quite small, which is the exact opposite of him before his accident. Will tries to motivate Louisa to change her life, to start doing something different and interesting. She's still seeing her longtime boyfriend, Patrick, though they break up due to his jealousy.

With the help of the internet and Treena, Louisa manages to plan a holiday full of adventures for Will in Mauritius. The night before returning home, Louisa confesses to Will that she loves him and kisses him. Will tells her that he has something to say, but she knows he wants to tell her about his plans with Dignitas. Louisa confesses that she knows. Will tells her that she has made their time together the time of his life, but that he can not bear to live life in a wheelchair. He would be following through with his plans. Angry and hurt, Louisa stomps off and does not speak to him for the rest of their trip. When they return home Will's parents are pleasantly surprised to see him in such good physical condition. Louisa, however, abdicates as caretaker, and they understand that Will has not changed his mind.

On the night of Will's flight to Switzerland, Louisa decides she has to see Will one last time. Her mother opposes because of the same reason Louisa didn't want to work as Will's caregiver at the start, but Louisa gets approval from her father and proceeds. When she meets Will in Dignitas, they both agree that the past six months have been the best in their lives. He dies shortly after in the clinic. Will leaves Louisa a considerable amount of money to continue her education and to expand her horizons beyond her hometown.

Time-gazing...

Well its been a fuzzy and crazy week with all the overwhelming emotions flooding in with Post-graduation finally coming to an end, possible ways of upcoming future. 

When I was in my graduation I actually felt as if I was in such a dumb college campus, it strictly looked like a block of educational campus with no-nonsense serious teachers and huge lawn but quite use less to hang around. 
So when I first entered into my college of pune for my MCA I was ecstatic when I saw those whirling roads and canopy of huge trees leading to my future college, and man... That was it.
That was the moment in my life that I believed dreams actually comes true. 
If I had to stay in that college for like 10 years I'd be darn happy about it, because yet I havent found a beautiful place like my college campus to take laisuerly  strolls among those same huge trees canopy, and heavenly smelling grounds after the rain, friends sitting and laughing  across the wooden benches, (more than friends whispering secrets in each others ears), or couples fighting over something so important or singles waiting dutifully with their bikes ready to receive their friends , it all seemed so dispersed and amazing to a girl with a observing eye. 
and then there I was taking a one last stroll out after my final actual visit to college. All I was seeing was that girl coming in with new dreams in her eyes, and that girl who was engulfed in thoughts, and the girl who wished this should never end while going through a rain fall from there and of course finally laughing at the stairs of cultural center and with cake icing across cheeks and suddenly overwhelmed with all the emotions and memories this place had given me. 

And then they say, 

The best you ever had is just a memory.

and I found out that how true it is, but those memories stay with us, wrapped up very carefully in satin and silk of time and emotions and we can actually look back at them with utter love towards each of these moments when we were infinite and we were happy that we wished it should never end, and it should go on... just go on...
Like the long shadows on the road on crisp evenings in summer, and soft putter of rain on the window pane on wet nights of rainy day or the soft coverlet of full moon's light on a moony night...

And those are the times of Time-gazing. 


To the post-graduation and the bitter-sweet memoirs of a important part of my life to cherish...