Change of roles

So this post is about a day when I felt as if changing from one person into another by a 

quick change of time and situation. 

After so many times of deciding to go for an event of social event arranged by my company I had a good opportunity this weekend. 

After a long night surviving half of the movie “Mohabbatein” -(my roommate insisted on this that I must watch this movie , because duh…who hasn't watched Mohabbatein?) , I woke up in haze in morning so sure of leaving

for the day. 

we left our place and went into office first to get the projector and I bought 4 bars of energy bars, just to be handy in case we get hungry on the way. 

We met a guy who was also coming with us for this event and then we set onto our way to Anchetty which was the village(2 n half hour away from Bangalore) for teaching the kids in high school computer programming. 

I was quite happy and excited about this rather than my usual nervous one. 

We slept while going there since the road was too long and weather was amazing. 

We reached there and I was quite surprised to see a young boy of mere 25-26 being the headmaster 

of the school. 

The students on the other hand were looking at us with curious eyes as if we were some kind 

of new animals in zoo. 

I loved this feeling of role reversals since this is the reason I wanted to do this. (when I was in college,

if any people from company would come around I would feel super cautious as if what they must

be thinking about us). 

I found out that they just feel like helping us. I just wanted to tell them to keep going and one

day they can reach at the same place I was standing. I took control after some time, tried to teach 

them what I knew. and made sure they understood whatever I taught. Later I received a feedback from one of the manager who was with us that I was pretty good at whatever I tried to teach them. 

That was the best part of whole day, when you know you have done something worthwhile by putting yourself in a different kind of situation. 

The whole experience reminded me of my school and my college days, also gave me a realisation that I have begun to understand how to be social when I meet new people. 

And also that none of what we do in our life goes to waste. 

Of course as per Ayn Rand, “there is no selfless altruism”, and that people do things for others

because it makes them feel good about themselves . 

So as long as both are benefited from the act of a good deed. I don't mind doing it. 

selflessly or selfishly… 

We returned from this place after 3 hour session

and a 3 and half hour long drive from Bangalorean traffic, and then we had plans to go out for a party 

which was in a club. 

I changed from my so called descent attire to a party wear with heeled boots and red lips, arrived at a dark place where people drink and smoke and a weird stench welcomes us. 

It was as if walking into a garbage chute. It took a while for me to adjust to the dark 

and lights and the smell. 

But then as per time i was quite used to it. I don't drink so I couldn't do much except stare

at the people around me drinking beers and wines and LIT’s and blowing smoke from 

hookah in the air. When the Dj started everyone was pretty high and 

we were on the dance floor. The thing I love about this is that nobody gives a crap about what you are wearing or how you dance or what your name is. 

You become a part of unknown feeling of letting go and it takes you in regardless of your identity. 

The disco lights were twinkling above and the beats filled the room. 

The Dj was amazing , so we didn't stop till it was the last song of the evening. 

As always I danced like crazy, laughed like a mad woman getting high on the feeling of being with high 

people. Checked out some people, some checked me out. 

But that was sort of like the ambiance of the place. We saw a mild fight which fortunately didn't

turn into any argument. 

watched a women get way too high and loose control. And then left for the night, wearing glow sticks and 

stamps on our hands , as the proof that yes we spent an evening in a crazed place. It was raining outside and I switched on to  Coldplay song. 

As always a weird feeling surrounded me of being two person in one day. As if both people from those two situations maybe won't even recognize me in crossovers. 

Why be happy for selfishness then, or

why be happy for the freedom and the regret that comes with it. 

I felt as if I am balancing the sum and it all ends up into a big zero anyway. 

So this one is to being two people at once. 

To the point where you can't get the difference.